Ian Arunga is my name. It has come to my attention that you do not know who I am. I am the second last born of 8… Where did I lose you?! I am almost growing a mustache… I think!!
This is boring!!
MY ONE AND ONLY DORIS,
I was in church last Saturday, like all Saturdays except the times I decide to fall sick!! I was there early with the family… 9:30am… That’s like when the pastors check in!! I am sitting alone at a corner tweeting!! Waiting for the man who will teach me how to love God!! I have this theory that if my shirt is better than the pastor’s, i will not listen because clearly GOD LOVES ME MORE!ha ha ha!! I am such an idiot!! It is only the wise who can admit that they are idiots. The pastor had a green shirt… I fell asleep almost immediately! Almost immediately means immediately after the children story!! I ABHORE GREEN!
Lets move on!
So I carried 6 mandazis to work today for my 10 o’clock tea… I kept them in the kitchen and now I have 4 only!! I have decided too sue the whole company!! Everyone is a suspect!!
On my way to work I met this man with a huge yellow sign saying "ANY JOB WILL DO PLEASE". Things like these break my heart! So I stop the matatu i am in and get off. Please be advised that this is nowhere close to where I get off. I walk to him and hand him 500 shillings!! That is a man willing to do anything to have some food… I respect that!! He wasn’t asking for money, he was asking for a job!! He is completely confused by my deed!! Now I am 500 shillings short of buying my bicycle- but at least i got to feed someone!! I BRAG ABOUT MY GOOD DEEDS =) I LOVE IT!
Lets go back to church (SCENE 2) Now this little girl seated in front of me has this biro pen and blue ink all over her dress!! She is trying to get her pen to write. She has sucked and flicked and threw it on the floor!! Moral of this small bit-SUCKING BIRO PENS IS SO YUCK!!!
I will leave now! Have to get ready for my second degree!! Sigh! Education is from Lucifer!!