BALLS!!

Dear Doris,

So Its 6:30pm and I m still at the office coz of this one letter I had to send you!!!

The weekend was amazing…

So my parents went to the Mara for their 28th anniversary which was fully paid by my siblings in the States, a fact we were made aware of at 5am on Friday morning just before devotion! My mother, Mama, made it clear how well she thought of OUR SIBLINGS!!

“By the way, we will be traveling to the MARA this weekend for our 28th anniversary. YOUR SIBLINGS who are in the States paid for everything……. YOUR SIBLINGS ORGANIZED EVERYTHING!!!” This was at dawn!!

Yes, we still wake up at dawn for devotion… All I get from those prayer sessions is “AMEN”.

The parents came back on Sunday evening!! Very happy. They couldn’t shut up about the animals and the hotel!! At the dinner table, they went on and on!! My dad is very chilled out, but this time he was out of control!! WAH!

Then, Mama decides to finish off with this story of how 3 cheetahs killed a buffalo!! This was getting boring!!

“Cheetahs are very intelligent!” she started, taking a bite of her fish!!

” VERY!” my dad responds!! Having the least of ideas of whats coming next!!

“IMAGINE THE JUST SURROUNDED THE BUFFALO AND ONE OF THEM….”

Wait before I finish what she said, let me give you a brief description of Mama.

She is 55 and beautiful. She, if you have heard of the book; THE POWER OF A PRAYING WIFE By Stormie Omartian; is THE PRAYING WIFE!!! She is the first in church if not the 3rd….There are some things you don’t expect to hear her say..

Back to the story….

“IMAGINE THE JUST SURROUNDED THE BUFFALO AND ONE OF THEM GRABBED THE BUFFALO BY THE BALLS!!” For a split second I reviewed an animal’s body and tried to figure out what other animal part is called BALLS!! The ankle maybe??!

The rest of the table was in total shock!! My dad almost got a heart attack!! I didn’t want to look at my brothers face (who slapped my leg under the table) because I would have laughed so loudly!! I completely ignored his existence!

She did not stop there…

“THEN IT PULLED IT OUT…” tears were coming out of my eyes from containing my laughter….

She continued…

“BABA DID YOU SEE??!!” she asks my dad who is almost running away!!

“Yeah!!” Baba answers in a swallowed voice!!

Mama DOESNT STOP…

“SO I ASKED THE GAME RANGER, WHY THE BALLS!!!”

This is the point my brother leaves the table to go laugh in the kitchen… I wanted to hear the ending… So I stay!!

“BECAUSE THAT IS WHERE ALL THE ENERGY AF A MAN IS!!”

It was at this point that I was fully sure of what she was talking about…

Then the punch line which marked the ending, “I WISH WE CARRIED A CAMERA WITH GOOD ZOOM…DEWANENO MABER NDI”

I left the table to go laugh it out in the kitchen!!

My brother and I laughed ourselves to sleep!!

GLOSSARY:

DEWANENO MABER NDI- look for a luo friend to explain this to you!!!