(Dear reader, please be advised that I already wrote this post but somehow it vanished in the process of posting it. Sorry for the inconveniency. I am up at 1am trying to re-do it)
My love, tears are pouring down my face as I type this letter. Don’t worry, nothing is wrong, I have just finished watching WAR HORSE and the movie is extremely shattering! I thought it was going to be a bad movie, just like all the other movies about horses (except Secretariat, which I loved) but Spielberg has proved me wrong! I have read the novel that I didn’t get to finish….
But this letter is not about horses!!
My love, I am writing you this letter to confess a bad habit that is gradually taking over my innocent heart…. ITS NOT TOUCHING MYSELF so get your brains off the sewer!
Let me explain!
I take 5 matatus everyday! That is A LOT! I think! But something tells me I have mentioned this before! Normally a matatu ride is boring and uncomfortable! A man my height is in so many problems! To make it worse, I think all routes give our route all their old matatus! Our route is filled with old rickety cans for matatus! There is absolutely nothing to do in a matatu, if you are lucky, you might spot a yellow padded woman outside who will satisfy your eyes for a second or two… and if you are extremely lucky, this woman might be seated right next to you!! At this point, you control your fate… You can choose to sit there and sweat your balls out or lie to this woman all the way and get away with a phone number you might never use! But how often does this happen?? I know you are asking yourself, “listening to music?” well my friend… THESE MATATUS ARE SO DAMN LOUD YOU CAN BARELY HEAR MUSIC FROM YOUR HEAD PHONES!
So in my suffering, I have developed a terrible habit… To read people’s texts as they type them!!! IT’S SO ADDICTIVE! Please don’t judge me… Do you, I’ll do me, sawa?
I can swear I have seen all types of conversations… from apologies to ‘last night was amazing’ texts! From ‘I miss your kisses’ texts to ‘We need to F* soon’ texts!!! From “lets make up’ texts to ‘if you are not home by 9 dont bother coming’ texts! I have even come across, ‘ma just passed’ texts! I have been doing this for four years… trust me I have seen them all! My eyesight is terrible, so you can imagine how demanding this is for me!
I sometimes tweet the conversations I see. Follow me on @arungaian and you might come across a few. I have 15,000+ tweets so good luck with that…
But I am blogging about this today because I came across a special case!
This beautiful woman gets into the matatu and sits right in front of me! She is padded and has the cutest face. She is wearing a black sun dress with purple flowers. Her braids are curly and are softly falling on her back like a mane that has just been dressed! Her cheeks are full and her nick ringed! On her feet are those shoes people call ‘condom shoes’, the ones you get at Bata that have holes everywhere! She is wearing Davidoff… She smells like the 4th heaven! Dont ask me how I know women scent…
This woman has all my senses arrested… I concentrate on nothing else for the first few minutes, until she starts texting…
Here is the thread:
(Please note that the messages might have been distorted a bit, probably because I am not a video recorder to catch every line, but the story is pretty much the same)
Tim: I am sorry it will never happen again!
Her: you say that every time this happens Tim…
Tim: I messed up… You deserve the best. From now on I will be just that.
Her: I don’t know if I can do this anymore… This time you stabbed too deep!
Tim: Are you breaking up with me?!
Her: Give me a single reason not to and I will not…
This was all I was able to see before she got off.
This happens all the time, cheating is a game played by an outstanding number. Even YOU reading this know a story or two…
Sad thing is, this woman’s wallpaper was a little girl that she kept on looking at after every text she sent… She got of the matatu crying. Broke my heart!
(There, I have typed it again!! I love you all that much)