05 Apr

My Lover,

Darling, my darling.  One line in haste to tell you that I love you more today than ever in my life before, that I never see beauty without thinking of you or scent happiness without thinking of you. You have fulfilled all my ambition, realized all my hopes, made all my dreams come true.

You have set a crown of roses on my youth and fortified me against the disaster of our days.  Your courageous gaiety has inspired me with joy.  Your tender faithfulness has been a rock of security and comfort.  I have felt for you all kinds of love at once.

I have asked much of you and you have never failed me. You have intensified all colours, heightened all beauty, deepened all delight. I love you more than life, my beauty, my wonder.

This letter will not be long. I dont have a story to tell you… I do but its not long! I just wanted something small to wish you a HAPPY EASTER.


Yesterday on my way home seated on THE SPOT on some old matatu. On my right is a primary school girl. She can’t sit still. She is moving a lot and is talking to the driver like they are married! She is tiny, she is in class six – I am sure of it – I will explain this a little bit later!

Strange thing is, she talks a lot of sense. Or rather the truth! Not sense… Truth is more like it! She talked all the way home!

“Mbona haukumaliza shule?” she asks the driver at the top of her voice… Her voice pierces through the loud radio like a gunshot through an abandoned farm-house! Everyone in the matatu struggle to follow this conversation!

“Nilimaliza!” The driver answers on hesitated breath!

“Kweli? Na mbona unado kazi ya matatu?” She interrogates with no remorse!

Here is the funny part! The makanga reduces the radio volume with his remote control… It reduces in loud annoying beeps until you can barely hear anything!

“Iko na pesa…” The driver answers fast in distorted speech… He is clearly not comfortable with the rest of the passengers listening in to this conversation… AND IT WAS GOING DOWNHILL!

“Ati?” the little girl inquires! “umesema?” she continues!

“Nimesemaaaaaa, iko na pesa!” the driver answers! More certain of his statement!

“Na mbona haujajivaa kama mtu ako na pesa?” She comes back like JACK BAUER!

“haha!” the driver laughs! He has completely nothing to say… I can tell from his face he is thinking about something to say… He gets it!

“Hizi ni nguo za job!” He answers with confidence! He had NO idea whats coming his way!

“Uko na manguo mzuri kuliko hizi?” The girl asks… An easy one for the driver!

“Ehhhh… Mob sana!” He answers!

“Na mbona unanuka jasho? ama hio pia ni job tu?” This girl was going too far and no matter how honest she was, she was getting annoying!

“haha!” the driver laughs in embarrassment! He is handling it well… He ignores for a while!

“haujanijibu!” the girl comes from nowhere!! The makanga is choking from laughter!

“Jibu mtoi!” the makanga spits!

“haha!” The driver laughs again! He ignores!

“Ukifika nyumbani uogesawa !” The girl says and digs into her back pack to unleash a huge tub of Lyons ice cream! She holds it with one hand and digs even deeper to get her spoon… We are at the Koinange roundabout! She is digging through the ice cream like a a mad human being… Which she is actually!

The driver decides to ask the kid a question! The man digging his own grave! I am sure he knew better!

“Uko class?” He asks in a smile… stealing glimpses at the child as she gobbles down her ice cream!

“Eight!” she answers confidently! Thats how I know she is in class six! She has ink stains all over her dress. This means she hasnt used an ink pen very long! Her socks and shoes are very dirty meaning she is playful… A candidate at this time of year doesn’t have that much time! She went out and bought a litre of ice cream… I am just trying to prove that she was not ready for the national exam!

“Mamangu aliniambia nisipomaliza primary ntaendesha matatu!” she spit amidst her gluttonous actions! The driver shuts up!

She was already halfway through with the ice cream by the time we got to Chiromo!

SCENE TWO: At Chiromo Campus gate, theres a couple thoroughly making out on the curb! They are literally eating up each other’s faces!

I cant lie, I was staring! Plus the matatu had stopped to drop people off!

Ok @kipepeomjini just called me. I am going to Brew Bistro and she is the only ride I have there…. I promise to tell you how it all goes down on my next letter.

The little girl turns on me… Please dont be mad!

First to third paragraph was done by Duff Cooper, English politician, to Diana, his future
wife on August 20, 1918.


Posted by on April 5, 2012 in love, matatu tales, random


Tags: ,

4 responses to “THE GIRL CHILD :/


    April 5, 2012 at 6:54 pm

    hilarious!! ant wait for part two

  2. ViValdi

    April 9, 2012 at 11:33 pm

    Ur writing is killer! too funny……keep em coming! Chekad til my blocked nose has potead! whaaat!

  3. jacquew

    April 10, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    LOL ….nice read!…sorry for your heavy heart 🙂

  4. Krista

    July 4, 2012 at 4:47 pm

    too too funny, everyone in the office wonder why I ‘m all cracked up! great post


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